Writing is an Itch. This is a place to scratch.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

'Twas the Nightmare Before Thanksgiving

I think I'll take a small break from my regular series and do some pure humor, which I haven't done since my very first post: "Refrigerator Etiquette." I just wrote this one and posted it to another blog I contribute to once in a while just for fun.

How about a Thanksgiving tale of nonsensical proportions?
Hold on to your wits. Here goes.

'Twas the Nightmare Before Thanksgiving
By Rattus Scribus© 24 November 2009

'Twas the night before Thanksgiving and all through the land,
every turkey was afraid ending up a meal plan.

The dinner table was arranged with the greatest of care,
but mysteriously not a turkey was found anywhere.

The mother was embarrassed, the father nonplussed;
the children began to complain and to cuss.

The turkey, meanwhile, was partying up,
for avoiding becoming this Thanksgiving's sup.

But then it decided: "Enough is enough!"
And armed to the beak it stormed the house rough.

The chairs it upturned, the china it shattered.
We flew down the stairs to see what was the matter.

Then what to our wondering eyes should appear,
but a crazy-eyed turkey with not one shred of fear.

Its beard, snood and dewlap -- grotesque rubbery folds;
its razor-sharp spurs were a dread to behold.

Like lightning it turned when we all at once squealed,
and looked at us, drooling, as if we were the meal.

We tore open the shutters and flew out the window,
and landed like rags on the stones down below.

But we shut out the pain and fled down the dirt track,
that Thanksgiving nightmare shouting, "Don't even look back!"

So I share this tale truly from my heart to thine.
Become vegetarian while you still have the time.


Ivo Serentha and Friends said...

My compliments for your blog and pictures included,I encourage you to photoblog,


Even week another photo album

Greetings from Italy,


Fete et Fleur said...

You know this is one of the reasons I love you so much! You MAKE me LAUGH!! This was great!!


Judy said...

Very funny. I put a link to your poem on my blog. Happy Holidays to you.

Bonnie said...

Rattus, may I suggest Chinese food?

Haha, loved your poem. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving feast with your beloved!

Bonnus of San Diegus and her furry kids

Edie Marie's Attic said...

LOL LOL LOL! I needed that!

Hugs, Sherry

Marie said...


Castles Crowns and Cottages said...

Oh mon cher,
Thank you for visiting my post! Yes, isn't that a great scene from the movie? That is what the whole celebration is about: reconciliation and hope!!! Love you, Anita

elizabeth said...


My name is Megan Price. I've just visited your website
http://www.blogcatalog.com/blog/rattus-scribus-a-blog-dedicated-to-inspiration and I was wondering if you'd be interested in

exchanging links with my website. I can offer you a HOME PAGE link back
from Translation Guide website which is http://china-hsk.com/ with
page rank 3

If you are interested, please add the following information to your
website and kindly let me know when it's ready. I'll do the same for
you in less than 24 hours, otherwise you can delete my link from

Title: uk translation company
URL: http://www.london-translations.co.uk
Description: Translation company based in London England serving
businesses throughout the world.

I hope you have a nice day and thank you for your time.

Best regards;

Megan Price
Web Marketing Consultant

Michelle Shaw said...

As a devout vegetarian, I know that my response to this will be different from most, and of course, I was cheering for the turkey throughout the entire poem.

It was interesting to read this poem from the perspective of the turkey striking back. It's unfortunate that turkeys do not have the ability to stand up for themselves or make choices for themselves. People have taken it upon themselves to make choices for them, and those deadly choices are difficult for me to see day after day.
One of my favorite quotes is "Peace begins on your plate." I'll be thinking of your victorious turkey and raise a glass as I cook my Tofurkey this weekend.