Writing is an Itch. This is a place to scratch.

Friday, July 1, 2011

I Hate the Beach


Tea Rat: Oh boy! There's going to be a beach party! I better brush up on my 1960s surfer lingo. Twitchin, dude.

Rattus: Why are you twitching dear fellow? Are you ill?

Tea Rat: Twitchin! You know, as in great, superb, cool, boss, wicked. Now come on, let's book for the beach.

Rattus: Beaches are public. Why do we need a reservation?

Tea Rat: No, not book as in reservation. Book as in to depart post haste. It's gonna be far out.

Rattus: Oh dear, I trust not too far.

Tea Rat: No dude, that's bogus. I mean far out, as in cool, twitchin. Now come on, and can you bring that cherry umbrella of mine?

Rattus: "Cherry?"

Tea Rat: Yeah, you know, pristine, perfect.

Rattus: It is a nice umbrella, but it's mine.

Tea Rat: Woah, dude. Don't try to boggart my stuff.

Rattus: "Boggart your stuff? What in the world are you babbling about?

Tea Rat: I'm babbling? Dude, you don't even know what boggart means. What a burn. What a chop.

Rattus: I think I'm going to lie down.

Tea Rat: Don't get groady on me. Don't shine me on. Aren't we goin' to shag it to the beach?

Rattus: Going to the beach just sounds like too much work.

Tea Rat: But I was so stoked to dig up some scratch for some scarfs and split to shore. We were going to have a primo, righteous time.

Rattus: I hate the beach.

5 comments:

Dumbwit Tellher said...

Poor Rattus, he needs to channel some serious Beach Boys music, wear a pair of surfer shorts, grown his hair long and dye it blond. Perhaps that'll help him get in the mood to hang-ten and throw caution to the salty sea air? I'm hoping you and Anita have a fabulous, fun 4th weekend Ruben!

Cheers ~ Deb

Castles Crowns and Cottages said...

Oh precious one, together we have survived and have found each other to color in the blank pages that were neglected but never too late to save...listen, taste, take in the perfumes of each season and CREATE! MOI

Angelsdoor * Penny said...

Ruben
You are such a HOOT! Thank you for coming to the wedding. So good to be back.. I have missed Rattus!
Enjoy your weekend my friend
Penny

Fete et Fleur said...

Love this!! I needed a chuckle.

Hugs,
Nancy

P.S. Happy Fourth!

George The Lad said...

Oh Rattus, I love the beach, not so keen on the sea, Tea Rat its going over me head what you is saying ;)
Come on Rattus lighten up summers here.
Have a good week
See Yea George xxx